i am failing at this this week. kevin comes home this week FINALLY. it has been the usual 6 week stint, but it hasn’t been the usual 6 week stint. he switched jobs which included a false start at a job, a week of no job, 2 weeks of training, and finally working mostly nights. ughhhh. i’m not even the one who went through it and it was real rough.
with his return this time i feel like he isn’t just coming home from work. i feel as if he is returning from a quest through mountain peaks and desert sands. when i see him walking toward me i picture he’ll be dressed in tattered clothes, bearded, unshowered and weak with thirst. we will collapse on each other, “we made it”.
so as i await his return i’m in a state of life paralysis. no gusto for anything but him. this is the worst way to go about it because it only makes the days longer. but as each day comes to an end i smile giddily, knowing i’m one day closer and he will soon be here to end my internal agony.
the other night i was watching an old seinfeld episode “the pen“. in it jerry is trying to make elaine feel better about their stay with his parents in florida with no a/c, sleeping on a back breaking sofa bed.
ELAINE: Why is it so hot in here? How can they sleep like this?
JERRY: It’s only for three days. Today’s over and we have tommorow. We leave on Sunday. It’s one day, really.
ELAINE: Oh man. What is with this bar? It’s right in my back. It’s killing me.
JERRY: Oh you wanna switch? I’m sleeping on a love seat. I’ve got my feet up in the air like I’m in a space capsule.
ELAINE: I am never gonna fall asleep.
JERRY: Oh, don’t say that. You’ll jinx me.
ELAINE: How can they not put the air conditioning on?
JERRY: They’re nuts with temperature.
ELAINE: This bar is right in my back! It’s making a dent.
JERRY: How about that guy writing a check for 19.45?
ELAINE: I’m sweating here. I’m in bed, sweating.
JERRY: It’s one day. Half a day, really. I mean you subtract showers and meals, it’s like twenty minutes. It will go by like that. (snapping his fingers)
then later the chiropractor tells her she can’t get on a plane with her back so bad and needs to stay put…
ELAINE: (to Jerry) Five more days?
JERRY: Well today’s almost over. And weekdays always go by fast. Friday we’re leaving. It’s like two days really. It’s like a cup of coffee. It will go by like that. (snapping his fingers)
i need more of jerry’s attitude huh?